You don’t have to be the smartest person in the room.
The title of the article might sound absurd because, we all try to be as smart as possible, but you don’t have to be the smartest person in the room.
Imagine a day spent with Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory On-screen he might be interesting, funny and playful but living with him will be unimaginably awful.
Imagine living with a person who is unable to speak 10 lines without using Sarcasm at all or Imagine living with a person who will correct you for all your grammatical mistakes. Most smart people focus on perfection and sarcasm is a by-product of an intelligent and creative mind. Sarcasm was once referred to as “the lowest form of wit but the highest form of intelligence”, but it might hurt people.
My personal experience also suggests the same. I was unable to interact with most of the people around me. Most of the time my conversation was focused on Books, Articles, Research studies and other geeky stuff that I am doing, and when somebody starts a conversation with me, I was kind of “Read that before” or “Know it all” person.
Most of the time the conversation used to be “Me Centric”. I used to talk only about my interests, my reading, my life, without listening to the other person. I was a “Bad Listener”, which resulted in a revolting character.
Most of the people were either not interested in talking with me because I wasn’t giving them chance to speak or they were afraid that they might not be able to understand the things I am talking about or I might make fun of them with sarcastic comments.
When I noticed the behavioral changes in the people around me, I started to work on being a “Good Listener”. I started to ask questions to the other person, I started to pay attention while the other person is speaking, I started taking interest in the conversation, I stopped cutting the conversation in between. I learned to level my communication based on the person, I am talking to. I learned to stay quiet. Because:
The quieter you become, the more you listen.
The world just loves a good listener. So, instead of focusing on being the smartest person in the room, focus on becoming the most interesting person in the room, focus on being a Good Listener. Show interest in the conversation. Try to go beyond just the verbal conversation. Show empathy. Focus on developing your Emotional Quotient(EQ) along with your Intelligence Quotient(IQ).
To become a good listener you should just start listening, as simple as that.
Here are some tips which might be helpful
- Start with a compliment and if somebody compliments you, thank with a compliment.
- Ask questions during the conversation.
- Be present while talking, don’t stare at your phone.
- Maintain a good eye-contact.
- Ask for opinions or help and help others.
The ability to engage anyone in a long conversation is a great skill to have. It will help you build a network, It will give you an interesting personality and make you a lovable character.
Thank you for reading.
Live long and prosper.